8 Parting Mantras

 Aloha!

Mantras can be a powerful tool in many aspects of life. Repeating positive thoughts & words has been proven to make athletes faster, calm anxiety and produce positive outcomes in many scenarios. One the most memorable mantras that comes to my mind as I write this blog is "Breathe." It may sound simple on the surface, but I launched it for myself in May of 2012, when I did my first Olympic distance swim (.93 miles) in Lake San Antonio, as part of the Wildflower Triathlon series. I was so incredibly nervous that in order to coach myself in the chaos of the open water swim start, I had to calm my nerves in order to breathe and swim properly. A challenging concept for open water swimmers (especially newbie triathletes!) is to not let their minds wander and wonder (and subsequently panic about..) what is below the water's surface (anyone who has participated in open water swimming has most likely had cycling thoughts, such as: 'what's in the water? a shark? jellyfish? or mystery item' - haha!)

While I've used mantras to 'muscle' through athletic events, I've needed to tap into these 8 powerful mantras below (which also work well in athletics) to survive life and make it through the past 14 months:

1. "Tunnel Vision." - Focus on what lies ahead, blocking out all distractions.
2. "Make stumbling part of the dance." - Even though many eyes are glued to me/my actions, maintaining humility and not caring about being perfect relieves pressure. Never did that in the past anyway (perfection is boring), why start now?
3. "Protect your Peace." - I've had to change my phone number multiple times due to harassment/threats. If I let people's negativity in and try dictate my life (which many have tried… you'd be shocked), this can really affect my mental health. Most people in my life, I discovered, had their own self-interests and agendas, not truly caring about me as a person, including whether I lived nor died. (Yep, it got that bad!)
4. "Confidence is Key." - Trusting my gut instincts, even without having complete knowledge and truthful answers, doesn't mean I lose confidence in myself to get things fully done. I have enough experience to predict the probably of the outcomes of my efforts. 
5. "Trust yourself." - I worked closely with a therapist to really fine tune and understand my inner workings and what's best for myself and my son. This mantra came in particularly handy 14 months ago, when I had to leave AMA at El Camino Hospital because the environment increasingly didn't feel right and I was getting both conflicting advice and chronic abuse from hospital employees.
6. "Do it for Yourself.” - Ultimately, I had to show myself love that no one else was willing to do, for a very long time. Doing positive things for myself also translates into a positive ripple effects for my son and other my loved ones.
7. "You don't owe anyone, anything." - For many years, people have felt entitled to my time and attention, even though they've been shady and disrespectful. As a kind person, I had to reinforce boundaries and remind myself they are not in my shoes.
8. "Whatever it Takes." - A wordplay spun off one of my son's favorite bands’ songs, Imagine Dragons, this is concept is simple. Sometimes it "took" a glass of red wine to relax or buying a new curling iron or dress, but yes, I've gone through many lonely holidays, where sadness vibes ran high, without my son. I don't (nor ever) have done hard drugs (except, sadly, when the times I have been roofied by men in my past). Conversely, I've done a lot of addiction counseling over the past year on my journey! Interesting year-end reflection, considering my 2023 enrollment at Canada College (where I am currently enrolled as a Human Social Studies major and took a public speaking class last summer.) 

At the encouragement of friends, I've created a small wish list of 'feel good' items. If you wish to contribute, please visit my list. Cash donations are also welcome as most of my assets are being held up / tied up in Norcal, under mounds of legal paperwork. Thank you in advance.

May you have a blessed 2025.

With Aloha,

Heidi