The Best Revenge: A Good Life

 Happy January 14th!

A few years ago, while working through deep-rooted trauma, I was re-introduced to the concept that the best revenge is a good life.

And while that is hard to argue, whenever you get advice from anyone - I urge you to look the entirety of the person giving you advice. In this case, a white male gave this to me... sure, isolating this variable if you are born a white male, chances are you've got the easiest access to privileges (in the US, especially) and frankly, depending on who you are/which family you come from, rules and laws simply don't apply to you, like others with a different skin color or gender... At least in this case, it was not unsolicited advice, which has been a common theme in my life: unsolicited feedback from white males. Ha! No, rather, in this case it was greatly appreciated.

However, getting back to this core concept. Yes, I wholeheartedly agree: living your best life independently from people who wronged you is the best revenge... however, I decided a few months ago that the best revenge for both my son and I is multifaceted and rather than a simple 'good life', we deserve a GREAT life. Furthermore, after what we have endured from not only my ex, but the corrupt parties involved... they should all pay for it - plus a hefty tax. What’s the going interest rate on the treatment we’ve endured? I’d say at least triple digits, at this point.

What does this “great life” look like? At the core is safety & support, a home with access to fresh air, nutrient-dense food, sunshine, resources & freedom. Kinda sounds like the classic “American dream”, eh? Ha!

So, Cheers to the great life! May all those struggling get a taste of the great life. I have found my greatest supporters are the working class and those who have been f’d over by this country’s wack policies & systems.

In that spirit & gratitude for those who’ve supported me, I’d like to dedicate this post specifically to a homeless woman, Vanessa, who used her EBT card to buy me a hot coffee last summer, when I was living in my car. I hope she’s safe from harm and wish her well. I urged local residents to add resources to “Vanessa’s Table”, a small table I renamed outside a convenience store.

While many folks these days say “giving homeless people money or food” is not the answer… I respond with “well, what is the answer, then?” I taught my son by example in the Bay Area. Sometimes we donated food, served food, tipped our favorite businesses extra or gave a begging person a $5 bill. Because, yeah, at least we are/were doing something. Can you say the same, reader?

Many years ago, I took a multi-fold and diversified approach to my humanitarian efforts (including donating both my time and money), but as my dear friend, Antonio Lopez, mayor of East Palo reminded me a year ago “Every time you try to do a good thing, you’ll get resistance.” So here we are… I guess my growing community efforts were not liked much, based on how I was treated in the SF Bay Area? Funny, how two years ago I couldn’t get fingerprinted to deliver meals to seniors in San Mateo County because of equipment delays, yet one year ago, I got arrested, without being read my rights, and subsequently fingerprinted so easily at the RWC jail. Well, such is life, I suppose.

May you have better outcome with your humanitarian efforts, folks. Didn’t pan out so well for me… at least in America. Maybe I should donate my time and money oversees at this point, when I finally get access to my funds, where my efforts will probably be appreciated. Now, that’s a solid lesson in American culture for my son & his classmates, isn’t it!?

Be Well & Carry On.

With Aloha,

Heidi