LA gems: Meeting Liz & Andrea

Aloha Monday!

Here we are… another week ahead of us. Today, I am highlighting two beautiful women I met during my predominantly traumatic stay at Las Encinas Hospital in Pasadena, CA, in November of 2023.

As many of you are aware, strong bonds are often made under dire circumstances. Whether it be during a combative war setting, sibling/families, institutions (such as county jail, prison or a hospital, to name a few) or a workplace. My stay at Las Encinas was no exception - with extra poor hospital treatment, an inadequate amount of food and bars on the window. Lack of freedom and illegal/inhumane treatment ran high, and unfortunately, still does today.

Together, our group of women made some strides towards better care, rallying for not only more food, so we were not hungry, but healthier food - including soup and salads. Also, Terrance, a standout employee, finally gave in to our request to host our group therapy outdoors. A quick aside on group therapy: it is not often helpful for me (as I benefit mostly from 1-1 therapy), yet it is strictly 'encouraged' (aka: pressured!) by all hospital staff, no matter where I have been admitted. And while I was admitted at these various mental "health" hospitals, it was set up that if you didn't adhere to group therapy, chances are you'd be stuck and forced into a longer stay. When I chose to stay solo instead of attend group therapy sessions, often I’d create art in my room - which was considered noncompliance.

By the time I landed at Las Encinas, I knew full well the drill (take the meds, be subservient and go to group therapy) - and could have been released earlier, however BY this point, I was so incredibly ready to blast some f'us to the doctors who weren't listening to their patients - not only me, but on behalf of others! My stay at Las Encinas got extended past the typical 5150 order because of my “fight back, take back” approach. One particular evening, I witnessed physical and psychological abuse from staff to a patient (as well as ADA noncompliance) and pulled a fire drill to deescalate the situation. Unfortunately, although there was a pause in those hostile actions, my move only angered staff and they punished me for it. The hospital administrators only asked me for details on the incident when I was discharged, to which I replied to the mostly unavailable mental health advocate employed on site: "Next time you get my feedback, it'll be with a lawyer present.” I encouraged one of the patients to press charges, but she mentioned it didn't work before.. still, I said "Press ‘em, and I'm there, my friend."

Let's get on to my highlighted beautiful women gems I met during my stay! There were many, including one of my roommates, Ashley, who I adored (and really knows how to wear black eyeliner!), and eventually I will probably get to recognizing them in my writing somewhere down the line, but for now, I will share my lovely connections with both Liz & Andrea.

First is my friend Liz. Liz was so lovely to meet and we enjoyed a lot of personal conversation. I empathized with her situation, taking the time to completely understand her family dynamic/set-up. Unfortunately, due to an abusive person in her life, she felt safer at this hospital, than she did at her own home. She had high hopes to finish law school and when I reached out to her when I was homeless last summer, she offered me a night's accommodation (her mother was in town, so I couldn't stay long-term). When I met her at Las Encinas, Liz gifted me one of her American Apparel florescent orange t-shirts, a welcome wardrobe addition to my red tank top and black/white Everlast boxing tights. The hospital claimed to be running very low on donated clothing for patients, which struck me as odd, given the wealthy area the hospital is located, but I considered that element par for the course! Another predictable component of a failed system.

Next is Andrea! Andrea was probably my most kindred, loving friendship made during my stay at Las Encinas. We really got each other, enjoying many meals and snacks together. She’s eight years younger than me and carries a beautiful, wise heart & spirit wherever she goes. At the time we met, she was under an abusive conservatorship (just like Britney Spears was! Her arrangement reminded me sporting my #FREEBRITNEY tee shirt a few years prior, in NorCal.) I truly hope everything worked out well for her. When I returned to the SF Bay Area in early December of 2023, I mailed her an e5 Maui Strong wristband and card to her home. We lost touch after meeting at Las Encinas, but she'll be forever an imprint on my heart.

Andrea & I shared our dreams (even planning a future trip to Mexico together, with our cute blonde kids!), related closely as moms and gosh, she is just so beautiful! She even gave me her prized blue mascara, a Target cropped black sweatshirt and shared her liptstick (normal things we could do an in abnormal situation!). On a political level, we discussed a revamp on how we’d organize the morning news and debated which color we’d repaint Air Force One… and although I’m more of an red woman, we eventually agreed on pink. Hey - you never know! Two brilliant, hot blondes running this country, cruising in a pink Boeing VC-25? That would be a nice change, wouldn’t it? Very “Barbie-like”, I’d say. But first, I think our family trip to Mexico is way overdue, don’t you?

Prior to crafting plans with Andrea on an “Let’s Make America Kind.” political revamp/campaign, I had mentioned to a few people that my young son & I could run this country better than most, even leaving behind recommendations in San Mateo County. Who knows? The upside to the current tragic environment of the US is that it can only get better. Or worse, if the brave do not act. It is your choice. Feel free to comment below.

May you be blessed to be cross paths with a Liz, Andrea or Ashley in your life!

Oh, one more thing! When they find out I’m a writer, many people have asked me to write about them. May I remind you of something? A popular phrase: be careful what you wish for. For you history buffs, this phrase originates from Aesop’s Fables, a collection of morality tales from around 260 BC.

With Aloha,

Heidi